give thanks.

it's been months since my last post. i suppose it means something along the lines of "i've been so busy doing life that i haven't had time to blog". we're now in to the holiday season, and our charming little boy is now 9 months old! nine! months! old! i can't believe it. these have been some of the most challenging and rewarding months of my life. it's difficult to remember what life was like before this little one joined our family.

i'm thankful for  many things this year. among them: family, friends, health, and faith. 

xoxo,

pj

5 weeks

Little L turned 5 weeks old this week, and I cannot believe how much he's changing. He's starting to "talk" more - he's always been a grunter and squeaker, but now it's turning into more of a cooing noise. It's adorable. He still isn't fond of having his diaper changed, but before and after, he's starting talking on the changing table. He's also thisclose to smiling, and his papa saw him make a little coo and do a half-smile yesterday while this mama missed it. Oh, well - I know there will be millions more to witness, and I just can't wait. We're still working on the sleeping-through-the-night business as there are some good nights where he'll sleep for 4 hours, and some bad nights where he's up every 1.5 hours to nurse. We're figuring it out. And I'm just so grateful that I still have 7 weeks until I have to go back to work - though I know it's going to just fly by. Also - I've discovered he likes having his hair brushed, hence his crazy 'do after Thursday's bath.



 

xoxo,

PJ

thoughts on motherhood: part one

let me start by stating: mothers rule.

before becoming a mother {just a little under a month ago}, i had no idea about the amount of anxiety i would experience about every. little. thing. i've spent more time googling things these past few weeks than i have in the past year. nipple confusion? acid reflux? baby poop colors, textures, and frequency? baby hiccups? baby lip quiver? when to introduce a bottle to a newborn? i'm not being dramatic. on top of the googling, i've been reading various philosophies about sleep training newborns and babies. phew.

i found myself worrying about whether or not L would have nipple confusion if we introduced a pacifier. or when we introduce the bottle, if he will like the bottle more than the breast. it all came to a head at about three weeks postpartum. i was sleep-deprived and emotionally exhausted. not only was i adjusting to this new life with our little guy, but i was spending my *spare* energy worrying about things that may or may not ever happen. in reality, L is on the fence about the pacifier, we still haven't introduced the bottle, baby hiccups are common, and his poop is normal. after an epic meltdown, i felt a weight lifted from my soul - and each day since then has been better.

L eats like a champ and latched on just after he was born, and has been consistent with eating ever since. but since i'm the only one able to feed him, means that he's attached to one of my boobies every 1-3 hours, 24 hours / day. i find myself in this strange state of exhilaration and exhaustion. i do think it's a incredible that my giant boobies have finally been put to work {and man, are they a workin'}.  i love the little grunts he makes when he eats, the way his little hand finds a place to rest hooked around my shirt, and the face he makes just after a marathon feed {i call it "milk face"}. i'm so grateful to have this experience and to bond with my little boy in this way. is it work? yes. but to me, it's worth the sometimes sore nipples and multiple sleep interruptions.

as far as the anxiety goes about doing everything "right" ... one of the best things i've read so far from the baby books? "do what feels natural". i feed L when he shows signs of hunger, without concern for whether or not it's been an hour or three since his last feed. when he's restless in his bassinet, i cuddle him in bed until he calms down and sleeps. i'm not interested in debating the hot topics {breastfeeding on demand, co-sleeping, etc.}. i'm learning to trust my instincts. i'm learning what L responds to and what he needs to feel loved and secure. after all, isn't that what it's all about?

xoxo,

a new momma

i know that breastfeeding is a hot button to press in the motherhood world. i would like to say that my own process has led me to have no judgement for those who have not enjoyed or been able to breastfeed. i am simply sharing my opinion about this topic -- my first and only experience with it.

January 13, 2013

I can't believe it's been over a month since my last post. The holidays have come and gone, and we're 13 days into this new year. This year, Hubby and I were able to spend time with his side of the family for Christmas and New Year's. It was really nice to be out of the City and with family. We also got to meet our niece, Stella and hang out with her parents who live in Colorado. Super fun. FYI - She's absolutely adorable and it makes me even more excited for our little dude's arrival.

This past weekend, Hubby and I took our first "baby" class - a breast feeding class. It was awesome. I learned a ton, and feel really encouraged. I'm also keeping an open mind about my expectations {especially the length of time that I'd like to be able to breastfeed}. Heading back to work after 12 weeks is going to be difficult and one of the things I was really worried about was figuring out a pumping schedule. Now, I have a bunch of resources about setting up a realistic schedule prior to my return to work and tips about adjusting baby to bottle feeds. Overall, I'm pumped {pun intended}. Later this month we're taking our two-day birthing class via Mother Me, Inc. I'm really excited!

One of my favorite things about having a kiddo a little later than our friends is their incredible generosity of passing on hand-me-downs for little dude. Seriously! Maternity clothes {thanks, B!}, clothes, toys, bottles, and accessories for this mama has saved us literally hundreds of dollars. I'm so thankful and grateful for the support of our friends. I haven't purchased more than $40 worth of clothes, and this little dude is set for at least his 6 months. Though there are still a million more things it feels like we should have -- we can now afford to purchase the items that we really want because of the support {like our stroller}.

Here are the last two pregnancy update photos ...





xoxo,

PJ

Holiday Wishlist 2012

Confession: I have not started any of my Christmas shopping. I'm particularly distracted this year which I blame partially on this growing belly and hormones that accompany. I have ideas and lists of items to purchase for my family and friends, but I have not purchased one item. In an effort to get my holiday gift inspiration going, I created my own little holiday wishlist of sorts. It's hard to focus on myself and not ask for things for the little dude that will be making an appearance in the new year - but alas! I did it.

Holiday Wishlist 2012 by pilarjoy

Holiday Wishlist: Magazine Subscription to Real Simple or Lucky | Tunnel Scarf |

Prenatal Massage | Infinity Ring | Slippers | Belly Butter | Woodsy Candle

25 weeks

I can't believe I'm past the half way point now in this pregnancy, on my way to the third and final trimester. Overall, I'm feeling much better still, though the heartburn, peeing every hour, and tossing / turning throughout the night is still abnormal. I also have been accused of having "pregnancy brain" when trying to recall certain things - thankfully it hasn't been anything important like meetings or events.

This past week I traveled solo for my first work trip since starting my new job. Happy to report I was on time for both of my flights and didn't miss either of the events. I was part of a national colloquium about human trafficking so that was pretty cool! I did a bit of sightseeing before I left, which is much more fun with others. But all in all, it was a really fascinating trip and I'm glad I was able to go before I'm too pregnant to travel by plane. Now I'm looking forward to this month of December and all of the holiday festivities that are on the calendar.



xoxo,

PJ

Autumn Updates

Although we didn't celebrate with dressing up or trick-or-treaters this year, we did dress Lennon up in his least favorite costume for 30 seconds before he shook it off.



We also carved pumpkins. Well, Hubby carved the pumpkins and I baked the pumpkin seeds.





I finally received the softest baby blankets ever that I ordered via Gilt for little bebe a few weeks ago.



I also have gotten back into the rhythm of my workouts. Since I spent the first few months of pregnancy vomiting {yuck} several times / day - working out was not on my list of priorities. I've started back up with prenatal yoga {which is just amazing for my sore muscles}, squats and weight lifting to work on my strength {for the marathon that is labor}, and walking in lieu of running {since I get muscle cramps when I go too fast}. Hubby has been a great encouragement for my workouts :) I'm feelin' good. Hubby has been a great encouragement for my workouts :)

xoxo,

PJ

a few things you've missed ...

Since I'm back from an unintentional blogging hiatus {like, the entire month of May}, here are some iPhone snaps of the last few weeks ...

{a tour of the new hospital with mom, dad, and hubby}

{the cinco de miler with friends j & b}

{mother's day with momma, aunt c and cousin i}

{a lunch with Hubby in his scrubs}

{new summer sandals}

{lennon made a trip to the groomer}

{summer arrived: denim cutoffs, espadrilles were necessary}

As much as I would love to say I'll be back to regular blogging, I make no promises.

xoxo,

PJ

Weekend Update

This past weekend:

• I ran the Race to Wrigley Fun Run 5k with dad {and ran my fastest time, yet!}


• I cheered on the Rush Softball team


• I wandered around some of my favorite downtown spots {the lions, horses, exhaust pipe sculpture, blossoming trees in grant park, and the tulips}, and had one of those "I love Chicago" days.

A lovely weekend indeed.

xo,

PJ

Be Kind to Yourself

{via Pinterest}

Though living with my parents has been an incredible blessing for our financial well being, it has been difficult.

Difficult in the sense that we're married {have been for almost 6 years}, and living with my parents.

Difficult in the sense that everyone around us seems to be on the next chapter of their lives including home-owning, baby-making, second baby-making, etc.

I try to focus on the good things: the money-saving, debt-freeing, quality time moments. But who am I kidding? We are living. with. my. parents.

If I'm not careful, it easily becomes a pity party - feeling sorry for myself and my perceived regression of "normal" life stages ultimately leading down a destructive path I call the "if onlys".

Are you familiar with the "if onlys"? As in "if only (fill in the blank) my life would be so much better". {My favorite fill-in-the blanks: more money, a better job, a child, a house, a car, a different career.} If you've ever been there, you know this: It's a dark, lonely place.

The truth is that we always want the things that we don't have. Jealousy brews just beneath the surface of well-intentioned joy sharing accomplishments of even the closest friends.

I am not proud of this. I am however, realistic. Realistic about recognizing my own tendencies to compare myself to others. It takes a lot of effort to keep my jealousy in check and to live in my own accomplishments.

Not only have these past several months fostered growth in financial maturity, they have served a ginormous lesson in personal growth. I am grateful for this.

I'm learning to be kind to myself, to accept my life for what it truly is: mine.

xo,

PJ

Review: Clarisonic Mia

I bought the Clarisonic Mia in January after months of reading reviews and lusting after the boasts of "superior cleansing". Shortly after I replaced my sheer tinted moisturizer with a SPF clay foundation, I realized that I needed to amp up my facial cleansing routine. After a few washes with the Clarisonic, my face felt significantly cleaner. Using it on my face twice a day was a little much. Currently, I use it in the evenings to deep cleanse and remove makeup.

Pros:

• An automatic 60-second timer ensures that skin will not be scrubbed raw


• Any cleanser works, so it's not specific to the Clarisonic cleanser


• Rechargeable, completely waterproof {I'm not afraid of electrocuting myself while I wash my face in the shower}

Cons:

• The Mia does not alert when it's time to move to a different face zone, so it's important to keep track of how long you spend on the different areas of your face


• Financial investment of $119 still feels a little steep

Overall, I wouldn't deem it "life changing" but I am satisfied with my purchase.

 

Do any of you use the Clarisonic skin cleansing system? What do you think?

 

xoxo,

PJ

True or False

Source: google.com via Brittany on Pinterest

 

 Question (True or False): You know your friends are quality when they allow you to show up for Trivia Night at the favorite neighborhood spot in post-workout sweaty clothes. And they don't judge. Instead, they praise you for your workout efforts, and feed you pizza.

Answer: True.

Weekly Gratitude

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfmrPu43DF8&feature=player_embedded

Weekly Gratitude is back! Here are the things that I'm grateful for this week:

• Lentil soup: I eat it {nearly} every day for lunch. Delicious.


• March 23rd is quickly approaching {see above}


• Monthly dinner and drinks with new co-worker friends


• Exhale's Core Fusion class {via Gilt City deal}


• Dinner with friends


• Getting close{r} to Hubby's spring break - hoping to plan a weekend getaway.

xoxo,

PJ

In desperate need of a change

So last weekend in an attempt to change my hair back to blonde, I had what will forever be referred to as "haircastrophy of 2012". My hair did not agree with the attempts to remove the copper tones. Instead, it decided to break off on the ends, catapulting into a "I'm going bald" panic. Well, I'm not bald - but I am sporting some very stringy strands {which I treat with a Fekkai Rx deep conditioner every evening slapping on my trusty shower cap while I sleep}.

So now I'm left with the question: Where do I go from here? I've been attempting to "grow" out my hair for the past few years. I've enjoyed having longer locks. I'm now wondering if I should start from scratch with a shorter do and start all over again. I've always enjoyed changing hairstyles, and throughout my high school and college years experimented with different lengths, tones, and textures.

This is what I'm considering {perhaps with a little more length in back} ...

{Pinterest}

Usually, I get quite impulsive about my hair. This time, I want to make sure it's what I want - because it will inevitably take me years to grow it out again. Decisions, decisions ...

xoxo,

PJ

Weekly Gratitude

This first month of 2012 has proved to be one very difficult month. Hubby started nursing school, a trauma occurred in my family, I was sick for three weeks which messed up my regular running routine, and I started a new position at work which has been more challenging that I expected. Decreased sunshine and the bitter cold weather has only contributed to my poor outlook on this new year. I finally feel like I'm starting to come out of this "rut". Finally!

These are just some of the things that I'm thankful for:

• Peppermint tea


• My new Hayden-Harnett handbag {post coming soon!}


• Greek yogurt


• My new Clarisonic Mia {post coming soon!}


• Gossip Girl Seasons 1-4 on Netflix


• Lennon's extra snuggles


• Growing relationships with co-workers


• A new challenging position {working with cardiac patients}


• My new counselor/therapist


• New cold-weather running shoes and gear

Do you ever feel like you're stuck in a rut? How do you get out of it?

xoxo,

PJ

2012

I suppose the phrase "better late than never" applies to this post where I recap New Year's and the last few weeks. We spent the new year weekend in Michigan with good friends. We stayed up late, played a few games, and relaxed in the hot tub. It was lovely. B and I saw Young Adult on New Year's Day. Overall, I thought it was a good film, just not a "feel good" film. Charlize Theron is officially my new girl crush. She's drop-dead gorgeous.





Since we've been back, I have been sick for nearly two weeks. I finally dragged myself to the Doctor's office on Friday, and was diagnosed with a double ear infection and a sinus infection. Even though I'm on antibiotics and "getting better", I still feel pretty miserable. I also haven't been running for two weeks, which makes me feel even more out of it. I've watched Season One and Two of Gossip Girl, gone through two boxes of tissue, two containers of orange juice, and nearly 20 cups of tea.

Here's hoping this week I finally start to feel better. Ho hum.

xoxo,

PJ

List-maker

{a few of my lists from my daily planner: 2011 goals, 2010 goals/wishlist, various songs/musicians to check out}

I'm a list-maker by nature. I love making lists of all sorts of things: for the grocery store, my daily tasks, weekly goals, etc. In the back of my daily planner, I have a section with a list of baby names {yes, I admit this}, blogging ideas, and various songs I've heard on Pandora that I want to download. Often, this drives Hubby crazy because I insist on "making a list". I will say that over the years, my process of list-making has begun to rub off on him as he has taken to writing down lists and enjoys checking them off almost as much as I do.

Every year, I make a list of things that I hope to accomplish for the year.  I vary between significant goals {fitness, learning a new skill or hobby}, and small goals {baking 1x/month, reading a leisure book 1x/month}. I find that writing down my goals, carrying them with me each day, I'm much more motivated to make efforts to achieve my goals. I love this method of goal setting often referred to as "SMART goal setting":

• Specific: What, Why, Who, Where, Which


• Measurable: How much, How many, How will I know when I have accomplished it?


• Attainable: Realistic, How can the goal be accomplished?


• Relevant: Is this goal worthwhile? Is this something that I really want to do?


• Time-Bound: When will this be accomplished? What is a realistic timeframe for me to accomplish this goal?

This system really facilitates the process of goal-setting. This creates a much easier system for setting specific and measurable goals. As I head into the new year, I'm carving out time to reflect on the things that I accomplished, and also re-evaluating previous unmet goals.

Are you a list-maker? Do you set weekly/yearly/monthly goals? How do you track them?

xoxo,

PJ

An Early Christmas Present

{Source: Fresh Air on Tumblr}

Just popping in to share a little humor with all of my fellow NPR Fresh Air lovers.

xoxo,

PJ

Inspired Tuesday: Ceremonials

Have you heard Florence + The Machine's newest album "Ceremonials"? I'm in love her voice and the complexity of her music. See my favorite performance here.

Here's a video of one of my favorite tunes from the new album. I could not find a video for my most favorite "Never Let Me Go", but if you're a Spotify member give it a listen. It's, well, brilliant.
http://youtu.be/am6rArVPip8

Nike Running Gear

So it's become a tradition {at least for the past two years} for Dad and I to run on Thanksgiving morning. This year, we did not do the 8K Turkey Trot {mostly because I'm ran a 5K on Saturday}, and instead headed out for a 4 mile run with my friend B. It was an absolutely gorgeous day for a run!

A few months back when Dad and I attended the Nike Chicago LunarGlide+3 event, Nike graciously sent a new pair of kicks and some tech shirts for myself AND for my Dad! We finally snapped a few photos of us in the running gear. I have been wearing the Nike Chicago LunarGlide+3 for my regular running shoes and I love them.

{our Turkey Day running gear}

{our sweet kicks!}

{the tech shirts and our sweet kicks!}

Thank you again to Chicago Blogger Network and Nike for the gear!

xoxo,

PJ