loss

people experience loss every day. i'm always losing my keys. usually they turn up in a couple of minutes at the bottom of the bag that i forgot i put them in. i can handle this.

loss of relationship, of people, of expectations, those are a lot more difficult for me to face. throw a combination of two of them into a 5 day frame, and you get one brutal week (and one emotionally exhausted pilar).

my grandfather died on saturday. he was an important part of my family: practically living with us for the past 7 years. i'm still in shock that i will never see him on this earth again. i know that he's no longer in pain, that he left his earth feeling loved. i've got 26 years of hilarious memories to lean on, and i find comfort in this.

i also experienced the loss of a relationship this week; a loss that i can't explain, that is out of my control. it involved a violation of trust, an intrusion into a very intimate part of my life. this loss leaves me feeling so disillusioned.

this week has also been filled with so much love and support from my closest friends and family. despite so much animosity, i am blessed to know that i am loved.